Alright, so, you know what I said in one of my previous blog posts? About just accepting that my writing isn’t perfect (and let’s be honest, it’s nowhere close) all the while learning and growing and just focusing on improvement? Well, I’ve learned something about that whole kumbayah, c’est la vie mentality.
It’s. Hard.
I’ve grown up comparing. Most everything I’ve read, I judge on either the fact that a. I could do better than that, b. that’s about my speed, or c. I would kill to have written it.
It’s not just writing, I compare in all aspects of life, i.e. social rank, intelligence, beauty, friendliness.
I was at confession this past weekend. And after I bashed my knee coming in the door and stumbled into my chair in a nervous flush, I confessed, among others, the sin of jealousy.
Father Jay nodded his head, crossed his arms, leaned back, and sighed before delivering this line, “Comparing is one of the most dangerous things you can do. On one hand it can give you arrogance and the false sense that because of something transitory, you are better than someone else. On the other, it can make you feel less if you don’t have what others do.”
One of the truest things I’ve ever heard. Hierarchy Syndrome is treacherous and has power enough to ruin your life. It ends up obsessing you with ways to move up or how you’ve moved down that you don’t focus on true growth or general acceptance.
And of course that’s going to be hard, especially if you compare mercilessly like I do. But looking back from the other side, you start to see that life’s not so black and white.
Just my personal perspective on the subject.
Like I said very briefly on Tuesday, I will be on vacation all of next week. This means no Tuesday/Thursday posts. (I know you’re really disappointed.)
But of course I will be bringing a notebook along with me to capture the inspiration when it strikes. If it’s anything good enough, I’ll share some of that with you on Sunday.
That makes me guilty, as well....
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